5 Tips for Surviving Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving Survival Guide: The Eating Disorder Version
If you’re anything like me you probably look at this day with a mixture of panic and dread. What should be a beautiful day full of love and family turns into a nightmare of panic attacks and behaviors. I get it, I’ve been there. And odds are that this year hasn’t been kind to you or your recovery but hey! That’s ok, because tomorrow is a new day, and even if it is Thanksgiving (heck BECAUSE it’s Thanksgiving!!) That’s another chance for you to win against your Eating Disorder.
One of the best skills I’ve learned through my time in therapy is Coping Ahead. Coping Ahead is basically preplanning, with a fun therapeutic twist! To boil it down, Coping Ahead involves running through your day or planned stressful event and deciding what skills you are going to need at which times. It can be helpful because often when you are in the moment it’s too challenging to reflect on which skills you need.
- Have a go-to.
Designate one person as your support before the festivities begin. For me this is often either my mom or my boyfriend. We discuss before the day begins and I know that if I ever am feeling overwhelmed or need a break I can count on that person to help me to find a resource or an out. Even deciding on a signal ahead of time can be helpful, usually my boyfriend keeps his hand on my leg when we’re eating so I know that he’s there & supports me.
Stick. To. Regular. Meal. Times.
I can’t stress this one enough, but do your best to stick to regular meal times throughout the day. Keeping your brain and body on a schedule will help keep you on a more natural rhythm and make the actual Thanksgiving meal seem like less of a crazy feat. Now if your family is anything like mine they probably eat at a super weird and recovery inconvenient time… like 2 o’clock. Seriously. Only day of the year we all sit down at 2 in the afternoon. But hey! It’s ok. Part of recovery is learning to be flexible. If your family eats outside of regular meal times I would recommend swapping around some of your meals and snacks. Personally I will be eating breakfast & snack one at my usual time, snack two instead of lunch, and then lunch (aka Thanksgiving Dinner) at my usual snack two time. Now here’s the big one- dinner. Part of recovery is eating dinner, to keep yourself on track with your meal plan.
Prepare your plate ahead of time
Personally I like to prepare at least one of the dishes myself, but if this is unrealistic for you and your recovery don’t push it. Knowing the meal plan (hehe) ahead of time can be beneficial to calming anxiety and keeping a clear head. If I know ahead of time that I’m going to be scooping out mashed potatoes, green beans, and veggie ham on my plate that’s a lot more manageable than just “Thanksgiving Dinner”.
Come up with an Out
Chances are the actual meal won’t be the only stressful part of the day. There’s the beforehand prep, the saying Grace, eating, cleaning up, small talk, sitting around… you get my point. Planning one thing that you can do (preferable outside of the house but WITHIN your movement plan!!) to help keep your anxiety low. My dog provides the perfect one for this- saying that he needs to go out and take a walk provides a great excuse for me to get out of the house for a moment. Going into the day knowing that I will be able to get out for a few minutes and breathe the fresh air is really helpful, and knowing when I’m going to do it helps me to control at least part of my day.
Create a Kit
Having a small kit of things readily available that will help you get through the day is a great way to help keep yourself grounded and in the moment. I have a little purse with a few of my favorite crystals, a roller with lavender oil, a little dog toy my boyfriend gave me, sensory beads and silly putty. The other thing I like to keep on hand is ice cubes (obviously not in my bag!!) as they are great tools for lowering anxiety quickly and efficiently.
Hopefully this helps at least a little bit, and again, it’s just one day. And remember- horses and animals are always there for you and will never judge!
Love & light,
Katie
